Despite my previous posts, let me state that my husband has in no way ever held me back from doing anything I felt I needed to do. I have held myself back. My husband has encouraged me to follow my heart, he has supported me and has had immense patience with me during my darkest hours when I have not wanted to be touched or bothered.
As a friend of mine so perfectly put it, I won the lottery with my husband. We first met when he replied to a discussion that I was involved in on a Metallica website. I was a sophomore in high school and I was just discovering different kinds of music. It has been so long now, I cannot remember what the discussion was. Later that same day, he wrote me an email. The email detailed a dream he had about me and a dragon. I was a little spooked at first. After all, this seemed a little crazy. But I have never been one to judge, so I wrote back. That first email began a long conversation that lasted many years. We talked about everything; our tastes in different kinds of music, religion, philosophy, history, life in general. After a year or so, we sent each other our first snail-mail letters, including pictures. This was before the days of Facebook and MySpace, and sharing pictures was not what it now is. So I sent a silly picture of me wearing a NASA shirt standing in front of my high school. He sent me a picture of him standing in his living room in front of a very beautiful wallpaper that showed a mountain stream. My first impression was excitement. A man who fit my ideal physical desire was interested in me? He was tall, had long dark hair, the features you read about in romance novels. I thought this was too good to be true, so in my mind it remained a fantasy.
I know what you are thinking. Long-distance internet relationships never work out. Well, we did not want a relationship in the beginning. We were just good friends. I had about 100 good internet friends back then. I even had a globe on my dresser where I would put pushpins in the locations of the world where I knew people. I know, I'm a geek. So this internet friendship continued and I dated other people, as he also did. It wasn't until my senior year of high school that it had become more serious. It was at that point that I begin to feel the pull on my heart. I had just emerged from a year long relationship that I thought had been going good. So, being the curious person I am, I began talking more and more with my exotic friend in the Caribbean. Fate must have stepped in, because we mutually decided to finally meet each other. It was a perfect time, I was graduating from high school and he was about to begin his yearly vacation period from work. So he bought me a plane ticket, and very nervously I boarded the plane and went to Puerto Rico for a planned 6 weeks vacation. He was going to show me the sights and introduce me to his family. I stayed at his families house during the whole trip. There isn't many words I can use to describe my trip except breath-taking. It was stimulating to me in many ways. I was in the oldest city in America visiting my idea of a dream man. I know, silly little girl talk but all true.
To make a very long story short, after my trip I returned home, but that tug never went away. I moved to Puerto Rico, got a job and began building my future. A year after arriving in Puerto Rico, we were married on August 15, 2003 in Ft. Myers, Florida. People said it wouldn't last. Those same people who said that it wouldn't last suffered divorce and hardship in their own marriages. Karma? Perhaps. You cannot judge what you really do not understand.
7 years later, there is no doubt in my mind. We will spend the rest of our lives together, and I regret that we will not have more than one lifetime. I love him more than anything. He has helped me through every aspect of our lives. He has been a wonderful and very active father to our beautiful daughters. Intellectually, physically, sexually, everything, he is my match.
I look forward to growing old with you, my love.